A good article. I’ve lost count of the people I know (male and female) who’ve wasted years waiting for “the one” instead of actually living the life they have. People often seem to fixate on some Disney fantasy rather than accepting the fact life is very stochastic (e.g. we may never, ever, meet “the one”) and that often the only possibilities we have are the ones we create. The universe isn’t our personal butler, on hand to drop what we think we want into our laps. Life is hard, brutal sometimes, unfair, unpredictable, and often quite random. We get to control only a tiny amount of what happens to us. So we should, I think, do our best with that little bit we can control and be realistic about our situation. Surely it’s better to have a cup of coffee when we’re thirsty rather than hold out for a carafe of iced tea and remain parched?

Tea in the Sahara doesn’t end well.

Anyone who enjoys my articles here on Medium may be interested in my books Why Democracy Failed and The Praying Ape, both available from Amazon.

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