Branding Gone Wild

How Airlines Could Differentiate Their Hard Product

I went to Genéve Aeroport to see my son off after his brief visit to Lausanne to catch up and visit with some friends he made on his last trip here. As we strolled through the Departures area with its multiplicity of airlines it occurred to me that instead of having the tedious Economy Class, Business Class and First Class, or the highly pretentious Executive Class or Superior Class or Upper Class or any of the rest of it, Airlines could instead aim to capture something of their national character in the names they use for their hard product offerings.

And so, without further ado, I offer the airlines of the world free and gratis the following helpful suggestions:

British Airways: Brexit Class, Remain Class, EU Passport Class

Quantas: Vegemite Class, Avocado Toast Class, Truffle Class

United Airlines: Beatings Class, Keep-Your-Seat Class

Ryan Air: Guinness Class, Guinness Class

Japan Airlines: Bowing Class, Deep Bowing Class, Head-Touches-Carpet-And-Cleans-It-With-Tongue Class

Delta Airlines: Trump Class, Clinton Class, Buffett Class

Nigeria Air: Scam Class, Embezzlement Class, Looting Class