Dear god
I’m praying you’ll listen to this because I think it’s important
To: God, CEO, Lord God Enterprises Inc.
Dear God,
I am writing to inform you of my extreme dissatisfaction with your products and services. Not only have there been precisely no miracles delivered anywhere within a ten thousand kilometer radius of my current dwelling in the last fifty years but your residual product is now so worn-out as to be utterly unfit for its intended purpose.
Moreover, I have on multiple occasions attempted to contact your customer service team by means of lengthy periods spent on my knees in prayer and as yet I’ve not received a single indication that my prayers are being heard. Your organization appears not to have kept up with innovations in customer service over the last fifty years. There isn’t even an auto-attendant, no message along the lines of “due to unusually high prayer volumes, all of our angels are busy at the moment attending to other supplicants. Your prayer will be answered in the order it was received.” There isn’t even any on-hold music by means of which one could be at least sure one had got through to the right number.
This simply isn’t good enough.
You must surely be conscious of the fact that complacency in today’s dynamic environment invariably…
