Dear Kitty, as self-appointed UN Rapporteur for Molluscs (and Acting Rapporteur for Sea Urchins) I must formally object to your article in which you make an equivalence between the morality of Donald Trump, esquire, and members of the phylum Lophotrochozoa. It should be noted that no mollusc at any time nor in any place has ever exhibited the repellent behavior typical of the creature Trump. Nor has any mollusc ever inflicted a fifth-rate trash TV series on anyone. Not even once. And while the slime trail left by the pseudopod may be disconcerting to some sensibilities, the moral slime trail left behind by the creature Trump (apparently some sub-genus of slime mold, as best as one can determine from the strange coloring and the total lack of sentience) is repugnant to all creatures possessed of a functioning central nervous system.

I look forward to seeing both a retraction and an apology in an updated version of your article at the earliest possible opportunity, lest you wish to incur the wrath of our little slimy friends. (No, not the Republican Party).

Only, it will take them a while to reach you.