Elon Musk Explains Neuralink

How it’s all part of a stable genius uber-plan (but not an Uber plan, ’cause those guys are totally lame)

Image credit: Clubic

The following is a transcript of a recent interview with the most smart and stable tech genius the world has ever known. It has been edited lightly to remove the sounds of cocaine being snorted.

So, Neuralink, I mean, how else are we gonna save humanity? Apart from everyone driving Teslas and going to live on Mars. Speaking of Mars, there’s a great synergy between Neuralink and my Mars project.

Here’s something not many people know: Mars is a total shithole. I mean, I thought I knew Mars. I’ve seen Total Recall like maybe six times. But it turns out Mars is this cold barren place with only a third of Earth’s gravity and an atmosphere only one-hundredth as thick and there’s no magnetic field to shield anyone from lethal solar radiation and basically it’s a total dive.

So you’d have to be nuts to want to go there, and you’d have to be super-nuts to want to live there. But here’s where my genius comes in: with Neuralink we can manipulate your brain so you think you’re in Tahiti.

This is pretty smart, right? I mean, no one in their right mind would want to spend the rest of their life in an underground concrete bunker…