How to Get to Down From Up

I’m going to explain how you can come to believe it’s a great idea to mutilate your child.

Trust me — this is going to make child mutilation great again.

Here’s how we begin: we find some emotive issue and we create fear around it. For example, “Those snowflake liberal teachers are indoctrinating our children and teaching them that only gay sex is acceptable. Worse yet, they’re also teaching our children to be afraid of good ol’ wholesome guns. This is the real liberal agenda: to feminize our sons and leave them limp-wristed pacifists. And don’t get me started on what those liberal teachers are doing to our girls! Teaching them to go and out-compete men, dress like men, stop shaving their legs and armpits, and get all confused about consent when a guy’s just having a good time. Worst of all they’re attacking our religion, telling our children than Christianity is just one of many beliefs and when science says something different from the Bible we should believe science instead of Jesus! Those liberal snowflakes are trying to turn our kids into atheists so they’ll be doomed to burn forever in hellfire!”

Now we wait for the reaction and use that as proof the other side is doing what we’ve claimed they’re doing. Demonize anyone who tries to show we’ve been lying shamelessly, call it “fake facts,” and amplify the original message just to show who’s boss. There will be lots of people so simple-minded they immediately believe everything we tell them and become so agitated they are easily provoked into acts of violence. This is a good thing because it ensures even more media coverage so our message gets even more attention and thereby attracts even more devoted followers. It also serves to normalize violence, which is an important step that will make our later incitements seem perfectly reasonable.

Next we come up with our Great Plan: “We’re going to fire all the teachers and close down all the schools and set up our own schools that will be better than the old schools because we’ll teach proper values. We won’t waste time on pointy-head liberal nonsense like literacy and numeracy, history, or science; we’ll get straight to the truth of the Bible because that’s all good American children need to know. This will protect them from the liberal conspiracy that wants to turn them into child prostitutes for the liberal elite.”

Then we ramp up the rhetoric. We blame the liberal elite for blocking our plan to shut every school and fire every teacher by 9am…