I could not possibly agree more with your article. It’s a truth I discovered many, many years ago. That said, there are many women who are uncomfortable with erotic talk beyond “I’m your slut” “you’re so deep” etc. But for those women who are responsive, weaving an erotic fantasy creates excitement like nothing else. Sometimes the fantasies are so good it’s worth trying them out in real life; at other times they should clearly remain fantasies. But in all cases they trigger deep emotional responses that lead to amazing sex.

One can begin by trying out a few things, along the lines of “Imagine if I/we/you…” and then discovering what happens to work. This requires patience and focus, but quite quickly one can become attuned to the woman’s inner erotic core and this then shapes subsequent erotic talk. I’m quite unable to create eroticism “cold” but I’ve done it many hundreds of times for women I’ve learned to know intimately. I’ve even provided written stories for several, thus providing pleasure at a distance when for whatever reason we can’t be together physically. But it’s always unique for the particular woman at that moment in time.