The Duck Equation: Where Are All The Angels?
If the heavenly host is so numerous, why don’t we see cherubim, seraphim, and all the other divine orders mingling with us at Walmart and Costco every day?
For at least a thousand years in Europe the dominant mythology of Christianity led people to see angels and various other manifestations of the divine. Statues that moved or wept blood were commonplace. Sightings of angelic beings, always at a convenient distance and witnessed helpfully by a single person, were also not infrequent and could be counted on to generate good business from the pilgrim trade for years afterward. Today, however, aside from the occasional sighting of a shop-window mannequin floating down the Rio Grande and quite naturally worshipped as an incarnation of the Virgin Mary, we are woefully short of such events. Instead, we’ve substituted the twentieth-century industrial-age version of heavenly manifestations. Today, people are abducted by technologically advanced alien species that have traveled hundreds or even thousands of light-years in order to insert probes into the nether orifices of abducted humans.
Whether this represents progress or not, I leave to the reader to judge.
Our fantasies about alien life occupy us to the extent that we even initiate quasi-scientific attempts to verify our latter-day weeping statues and heavenly incarnations. SETI (the Search for Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence) has been running for decades, perhaps driven by the hope that despite all evidence to the contrary here on Earth, intelligent life may exist somewhere in the universe. Oddly, and despite the enormous wealth accumulated over the centuries by the world’s longest-lasting business enterprise (the Roman Catholic Church), no meaningful investment has been made in a celestial equivalent. There is no public organization committed to a formal search for the discovery of heavenly beings.
Not until now, that is.
With not an inconsiderable amount of pride, I can now reveal that thanks to a combination of DARPA funding, grants from the UK Arts Council, contributions from luminaries in the Cosa Nostra, Mafia, and ‘Ndrangheta, and donations from millions of impoverished peasants, there is now…