When I attended one of the annual Prayer Breakfasts in DC some years ago I was struck by how obvious it was that a great many Republican politicians, advisers, and pastors are self-loathing closet homosexuals. Therefore your list of Republican legislation really should include items that reflect this "manly patriotic" Republican virtue. Maybe a return to the model of classical Athens whereby all upstanding hard-right Republicans get a ten-year-old boy to "instruct" for a year so as to ensure a suitably penetrating comprehension of US politics?