While this is vaguely amusing satire, it could have been better. For example, I was hoping to read about how blockchain will replace trips to the dentist, how blockchain will replace food, and how blockchain will enable us all to live to be 37,600 years old. Perhaps the next blockchain article will include these very achievable outcomes along with the usual reality-free babbling that blockchain enthusiasts repeat endlessly without ever once thinking about the fundamentals of the subject they opine upon. My greatest regret, however, is that there's presently no blockchain currency called the Tulip. But, like blockchain enthusiasts, I live in hope...